By Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway

A very simple way to say goodbye to the ones you loved before is to go with your new love to the ocean and partake in a simple ceremony using sand, surf and the power of Mother Nature.

All you need is a stick, a couple of plastic baggies, a prayer in your heart and the intension to have a spiritually clean slate for marriage.

• First, walk down to the water and look out onto the vastness of the sea. Let the cleansing waters, salty sea air and ocean sounds wash over you and calm you. Feel yourself centered on the sand. Say a prayer:

Mother, Father, Divine Spirit of All there is,
Please fill us with your holy presence and guide us in this ritual of release.
May all we do here today serve to set us free spiritually.
May it serve to also spiritual set free (say names) with love.
And so it is.

• Using your stick, or covering your hand with a baggie so that you don’t get sand in your nails, write the name of the first person you need a spiritual divorce from. Write in a spot where the sand meets the shore; where is just about mud, and the next wave is likely to wash it away.

• Watch as the wave comes to claim the spot upon which you have written the name. Notice how nature so beautifully fills in the dents in the sand and smoothes the name over with water. And allow yourself to feel that person released from you spiritually, with love.

• Say this prayer: I surrender my attachment to (name), and I release her/him to the universe, with love and with blessings. I forgive (name) and ask that all be forgiven between us on the highest levels. I thank (name) for all he/she has given me. May (name) be blessed in all ways. (Name), you are free now and I am free now.

• Go on to the next person. Most of us have a few significant others to release. Repeat this process for the most significant and then do one final release for “all others.” You and your beloved can alternate, each doing a release after the other. Or you can do yours and then he can do his.

• When you feel you have spiritually released your former loves, stand again and gaze out at the ocean and allow yourself to feel the calming power of the Mother, healing you and your fiancé, and healing all those loved ones you said your spiritual good-byes to.

• End with a prayer. Mother, Father, Divine Spirit of All There Is, Thank you for you for you divine presence. Thanks you for your healing waters and for the sand that shows us all in life can be smoothed over and harmonized. Thank you for your blessings and for your light. May all those present and all mentioned move on with love and blessings in a way that harms none. And so it it!

• Then draw two hearts in the sand, where the surf cannot disturb them, to signify your new love and partnership.

© Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway 2011

Adapted from Wedding Goddess: A Guide to Turning Wedding Stress into Wedding Bliss, (Perigee/Penguin). You can order an autographed copy here.

Posted June 12, 2011 8:08 PM by Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email This

Holiday season is typically engagement season. Many grooms pop the question with a shinny Christmas ring. But what if you are single and still would like to have a special ceremony? Try this self love ceremony.

When I teach relationship readiness seminars, I have people look into a mirror into their own eyes and recite vows to themselves. In essence, they marry themselves, first. The following is an abbreviated sample ceremony, just to get you started.

1. Light a candle and bring light into the room.

2. Say a brief prayer: Divine Spirit of all there is, please fill this place with your sacred presence. Support me in my efforts to express my love for self. Help me see my own divinity. Amen.

3. Sit down and meditate on the qualities you most honor in yourself.

4. Write down three vows that are personally meaningful to you: " I adore you … I love your strength and wisdom … I will promise to love and honor you … etc."

5. When you feel ready, look into the mirror and connect with your own eyes and read the vows to yourself. It may be uncomfortable at first, but you can transcend that. Your self-love vows will send a powerful message to your subconscious mind.

6. Celebrate your union with self with a sip of something sweet.

7. Play celebratory music.

8. Dance … and feel the love.

Need a shorter version? Every time you pass a mirror, smile and look deeply into your own eyes.

Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway is a leading interfaith and non-denominational wedding officiant. She creates unique ceremonies for couples of all backgrounds and faiths, and is also widely recognized as a relationship coach, bridal stress expert and columnist. She is author of YOUR INTERFAITH WEDDING: A Guide to Blending Faiths, Cultures and Personal Values into One Beautiful Ceremony, and WEDDING GODDESS: A Divine Guide to Transforming Wedding Stress into Wedding Bliss.